Sometimes, I think I live only for the sighs of my little grey cat.
I breathe solely for those moments when she creeps cautiously onto my tender abdomen as I lie on my bed, worn out and vulnerable.
And she discovers that the crevices in my body meld perfectly to her own. She finds that all boundaries between us are purely artificial. Her fur, my clothes, our skins become completely permeable. She relaxes her muscles into mine, allowing her very essence to seep down into my being. Our blood vessels become a greater network, somehow effortlessly pumping through feline and human without care for the difference.
She feels all this and she knows that she is home. She knows that she is safe. And because of this, she exhales completely, allowing every, last, tiny cavity of her body to be emptied. She saves nothing. She holds back no secret store to guard against some future scarcity. She lets it all go. All that she needs, all that she will ever need is here in this moment, on my belly.
She tells me this with her sigh, and I cannot help but be moved and awed by her trust, her faith—in the whole of this kaleidoscope universe—and also in the subtle rising and falling of one human stomach.
For many years I have regarded the posture of a sleeping cat as a symbol of utter relaxation. Here, you have put my sentiments into beautifully uttered prose. Thanks.
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Jan, what a lovely thing to write! Thank you. 🙂
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You described this so perfectly. I know that when my cat comes up on the bed to meld with me, I too can relax totally; I think it is what they do for us through their own complete relaxation and trust. Beautiful piece of writing.
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Thank you!
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Little humans and quadrupeds are quite amazing, aren’t they?
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They are, indeed! Thanks for stopping by. 🙂
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